Who was that?

My wife and I were at a pancake breakfast this weekend when one of the volunteers approached us and "How are you Mr. and Mrs. Brown.  We made some small talk before she moved on to another table. I looked at my wife and asked "who was that?" My wife shrugged her shoulders and replied "I don't know." 

My wife was an attorney for many years and now works for The United Way. She did and still does come into contact with a LOT of people and she is generally very good about remembering them. So, we figured it was someone we knew from soccer. Well, I have coached for many a year and conduct summer camps, coaching clinics and have been a director of coaching and or goalkeeping to boot. I'm not always so good about remembering names of parents. So, we figured it was likely someone we knew from soccer?

We ended up asking one of the volunteers co-workers whom we did know for her name. Turns out she was the mother of two (now) young men who I coached a few years ago. And our eldest son had even dated her daughter once or twice. Oh my!  And to top it all off, the last time I remember "talking" with her was after a high school game about a decade ago.  Well, she was actually yelling at me most of that time.  And that is what really prompted this writing today.

It was the summer before Jordan's senior season of high school soccer. He was in-line to be the goalkeeper and was being looked upon to be a senior leader for what would be a fairly young team. As I look back now, I realize this is one of the first times I used the word "entitled" in relation to an athlete. Jordan rarely showed for off-season summer activities. When practice officially started he was woefully out of shape.  Yet, he fully expected to be the starting goalkeeper and acted that way. His effort level left something to be desired those first few days of practice.

Meanwhile, there was a sophomore and a freshman also interested in the position.  The sophomore, Alex, was in excellent shape and a natural athlete. He was also our best field player.  Brad, the freshman carried a lot of baby fat but it was evident once he grew into his body he was going to be a good athlete.

We played both Jordan and Alex in the first couple of scrimmages and it quickly became evident to everyone Alex was far and away the best goalkeeping candidate on the team. Eventually the decision was made to start Alex and the team went on to a very good season.

Throughout the season both Brad and Jordan worked as goalkeepers. Every team needs a back up goalkeeper, right?  Well, Brad lost quiet a bit of baby fat throughout the season and began to become a chiseled athlete. He was motivated in part by the looming basketball season. At 6'3"ish and now a svelte 210 pounds Brad was pretty imposing for a freshman.  Jordan, to his credit worked hard, lost weight and improved his conditioning throughout the season as well. It's just that he was so far behind when practices officially begun that he couldn't catch up to Alex, or even Brad. He was the third string goalkeeper in the coaches eyes.

The confrontation addressed in the beginning of this article occurred late in the season. It was a last gasp attempt by a parent on behalf of her son. It was difficult for her to understand that her son had squandered away his opportunity during the off-season. Like her son, her focus was on the fact that once the season officially began Jordan was in attendance and did everything asked of him. There was little appreciation that this was too little too late. He had been outworked during the off-season and began the start of official practices already behind.

Jordan devoted a lot of time to church, work and playing in a newly formed band. There might have been 4H and county fair in there as well. All of these are admirable and worthy endeavors. I find no fault with any of them.  Jordan had choices to make and he did. He prioritized these other activities over soccer and that is also perfectly fine. On the other hand he couldn't find 2 - 4 hours a week to attend open fields. He missed camp time.  All the while Alex and Brad were present at off-season soccer activities and working hard in his absence. They both received opportunities that had Jordan been present they likely would not have received.  Maybe, Jordan thought as a senior he had a big enough lead on the underclassmen that he couldn't or at least wouldn't be caught from behind in the race to be the teams goalkeeper?

The days before and after the confrontation with his mother Jordan was visibly upset. His senior soccer season not at all what he had expected it to be. I remember having a famous quote running through my mind during that time. I did not share it with Jordan because emotions were too raw. I sincerely hope he learned this through the experience.

If you don't fight for what you want, 

you forfeit your right to cry over what you have lost.

Tough words, those. You, as the reader, may even think they are a bit harsh.  What they are is true.  And sometimes the truth hurts.  We can rarely have everything we want. Choices must be made. And what we ultimately end up with is what we devote our energy towards getting. Quality matters as well. Spread yourself thin and you might get a little of many things but be unsatisfied with the lot of it.. Devote yourself to a select few things and you might just get what you most wanted but miss out on some other things. Either way you will get a quality of experience equitable with the amount of effort put into obtaining it.

For me, I often tell a story about how Alex ascended as a soccer player and a person.  He really blossomed. I saw Brad on a fairly regular basis for a few years and enjoyed a good relationship there. Jordan I have not seen since that soccer season. And obviously his mother had faded from memory as well. I am very grateful our brief meeting this weekend was cordial and even friendly.  It prompted this writing and came at a time when I have been contemplating how to make some of these points to my current team. Thank God. He always seems to deliver moments like these when needed. I am Blessed. Who was that?  I believe it was God speaking through Luann.  Thank you God.

Lessons from Mentors.

I have a stated goal of learning something new each and every day.  My coaching mentors have been great aides in this pursuit.  One lasting lesson that resonates with me is to focus on those things you can control and do not waste time on those things you cannot control. Taking this advice to heart has allowed me to exercise great patience which has been of benefit to me personally and also to the teams I coach.

Properly preparing for whatever task is at had is another lasting. I can recall as a young coach preparing meticulously for practices.  I chose activities carefully and with purpose. Planned specifically. Truth be told, I do this in almost all facets of my life. For example, I rarely have gone into a meeting unprepared. Preparation is the foundation of confidence and in turn confidence is the key to success.

Sometimes learned lessons can seemingly come into conflict with one another. Usually, this eventually proves not to be the case. As a young coach it drove me crazy to diligently prepare for practice including a specific number of players expected to be in attendance only to have players not show up for one reason or another.  All that diligent effort on my part blown all to hell! How dare they just not come to practice?!?

And so I learned the importance of flexibility. My first coaching mentor planned practice sessions with adaptability being a key component. A theme was constant but activities had an element of fluidity to them and could be changed or adapted to fit the number of players available. You see, he could not control whether any given player would attend practice or not.  For some, indeed a vast majority of players, missing a practice was simply not an option.  Attendance was expected. There always seems to be an exception to the rule though.

It took awhile for me to understand this. While my expectation remains every player will attend every practice, if numbers for practice are not what I expected then to be I simply adjust the activities.  Now, experience has made this a much easier task to take on and achieve with acceptable results.

I have wondered on occasion if I knew then what I know now, would I have been so upset as a young coach when players failed to show for practice?  The experience factor plays a large role in this process. I'm not sure I would have had the mental catalog of soccer activities I now possess that allows me to easily adapt on the fly.

Dealing with difference of opinions with referees ...  Yeah, this is an area I am much improved in. In all the thousands of games I have participated in as a player, coach, referee or even as a fan, I can probably count on my fingers the number of times I have witnessed an official change a call. Just something I cannot control so I don't waste time arguing with officials.

Difficult parents?  When a parent believes they are acting in the best interests of their child there is no other opinion that matters. A coach certainly is not going to control a parent. I have had mothers flirt with me in an attempt to gain favor with me for this child. I have had confrontational parents attempt to bully me in order to have their child play a preferred position, start or play more. Helicopter parents who hover over their child in order to protect them from ... well, whatever perceived threat they imagine in the way of their child's athletic success.  In any of these instances and countess more not mentioned here, a coach cannot control the parents. I have learned to not waste my time worrying about parents. I cannot control them so why worry about them?

Another lesson learned is a coach really needs to limit social interaction with parents and families. As a young adult league coach I often found myself coaching friends. Not really a good idea.  It can be done successfully and I was able to navigate those potentially treacherous waters fairly successfully. And as a parent coach I often found myself coaching sons and daughters of our friends and neighbors.  Again, not something I would recommend for inexperienced coaches. Sports have a strange super power that can cause the most sane of individuals to become stark raving mad lunatic parents out of their minds.

I tried to attend team social functions where the player families were present. Disaster. I took my cue from ultra successful coaching mentors who were cordial with parents but never socialized with them. Communications were limited strictly to "business" in the sense of interacting with a single team parent to coordinate travel, pre and post game meals, parents night, senior night and the end of season banquet.  And these communications consisted of the parents doing all the work and informing the coach of need to know details only. I take my cue from Dick Hagen, Bob Seggerson, Larry Lewis and others.

As a parent I was often involved in selecting coaches who we would allow our son's to play for, but beyond that I did not intrude on the coaches space. I didn't always agree with a coaches strategies or tactics. I sometimes questioned starting lineups or distribution of minutes, but only to myself. I supported our sons coaches.  The only time I recall being upset enough to confront a coach was when one played my son almost an entire game after he had two days before been carried off the field with severe cramps. We had gone to an alternative medical specialist to deal with the cramps and she had performed miracles to relieve the cramping.  He could not walk into to the office but two hours later walked out under his own power.  Genesen Acutouch,  Un-freaking-believable!

I continue to learn on a daily basis. Many times lessons learned long ago are revisited.  The world is constantly changing and this affords endless opportunities to continue learning. And even when the status quo seems to remain the same, there still exists opportunities to learn anew.  For example, today I learned about Donatello's David and other art and artists of the quattracento era, Who knew?!?  Right?

Go forth to gain knowledge, control what you can control and don't sweat the rest.

It doesn't help.

Another one from Facebook, Equally as good as the previous.  Credit for this one goes to Mark Maguire and CoachUp Nation. The original article can be found here 

During the 2014 season, I asked my then 11-year-old son: "What do all the children in the dugout think when their parents urge them on with ‘instructions’ and ‘encouragement’ as they are playing the game?" He said bluntly, “they don’t like it.”

I further pressed him, "What about when I call out some last second reminders just before you bat, you know, the things we’ve talked about during the week and to help you remember what to do?" Again, he didn’t mince his words and said, “Dad, it doesn’t help.”

He then went on to say, “When I am in the batter’s box, I follow the instructions of my third base coach and put myself in the zone to block every other noise out. It doesn’t help me, or any other kid when our parents are yelling things out.”

I was staggered by his confident appraisal of the situation.

I went away and talked to a couple of players from our club who had played for Australia and in the MLB minor leagues. They said their fathers always watched them quietly and never said a thing. Let me say that again: never said a thing. They may have cheered when their son and his teammates made a nice hit or play, but they never put their own egos out there to think they would make the last minute difference to their son’s success or failure in the game.

I saw Zac Shepherd's dad in the stands one day at a Sydney Blue Sox game -- Zac is from the Hills district in Sydney and playing in the Detroit Tigers' franchise. I watched him closely, very closely, looking for any signs of him shouting out encouragement or frustration from the stands. Nothing. Even when his son made an error in the field or was struck out -- nothing. I also saw the dad when he was watching his thirteen year-old son play -- and he acted the same way. He just looked pleased to be there and allowed the coaches to do their job without him interfering.

Over and over again, I read about the players that have gone far in the game and, without fail, the same story appears. The parents watched and enjoyed the game in silence. They let their athletes play and enjoy themselves without putting the heavy burden of having to please the parent.

You might think: but I know my child and I know what helps him or her. Really? Do you?

Baseball is a game designed for you to fail. There is a tremendous amount of pressure on our children when they go to bat or are alone on the mound. And here I was thinking I could make the difference to my own son by sneaking behind the dugout to say some ‘inspiring’ words; or have a special code I could call out that only he would understand; or, as he swung and missed, that my ‘wisdom’ during his at bat would make the difference between him getting on base or not.

My son’s words ring loud and true even as I type this blog, “Dad, it doesn’t help.” But I thought I was helping, and in reality, all I was helping was my own ego and my pride got in the way. Yes, it's my own ego and pride riding on every success and failure of what my child did out there. I know we like to blame the umpire, blame the coach, blame anything to explain why our child may not be doing what we hoped for. Why not stop blaming everybody else and let our children just have some fun out there with their teammates -- let the coach do the talking.

Even then, the coach can get in the way at times when he thinks he can give technical input during an athlete's at-bat. Let me tell you, it doesn’t help either. The time for technical input from the coach or parent is when the player is in the right frame of mind, like when they're training. 

Over Christmas I finished a book called the Matheny Manifesto. If you find it difficult understanding the concept of how much us parents get in the way, just read that book. His letter to the parents of the Little League team he was asked to coach went viral and that is what inspired the book. Look it up. Search for it. It is an eye-opener, and this is from the current coach of the St Louis Cardinals.

At the end of a game or practice now, when I am driving my son home, I’ll tell him I enjoyed watching him play and note some good things he and the team did. I’ll try to have a laugh with him about some errors or ground-outs he made. And if he is ready, and I have his ear, I may raise an issue I saw during the game...I may.

However, I’ll phrase it in the right way so he doesn’t think it is my ego and frustration doing the talking. Because, it’s not about me; it’s not about any of us parents. Don’t we wish our big, fat egos would just shut up? I wish mine did.

Don’t get me wrong, I still feel like yelling something ‘beneficial’ out. I still think I can make a difference. Those that know me know I am a fairly loud cheerer and quite the clown at some games. Even recently in Taiwan, during the U12 World Cup, I was loud and having a lot of fun in the stands. But I’ve learnt to stop yelling instruction… because, of course, “Dad, it doesn’t help.”

Oh, and if you find your athlete is always looking at you when he does something wrong on the field, it's probably because he thinks he displeased you. Next time, why not move spots so your child doesn’t know where you are. Our athletes want to please us so much already and it hurts them even more when they know our ego and pride is riding on the game.

Seriously, make yourself and your voice a ghost. Take the pressure off them and let them be athletes that love the game. This game that is set up for them to fail, but also will set up for them to learn some great lessons of life.

I’ve learned my lesson from wise and talented men who played the game at the highest level, from watching a dad who has two talented sons playing the game, and from the honest mouth of my son. It is a hard lesson, and one that will pierce our hearts. Let our children say to us when they reflect back on how much they enjoyed the game, “Dad, you were a great help.”

Club Coaches and High School Coaches

I am both a club soccer coach and a high school soccer coach.

Mine is not a unique situation. 

Over the last few months I have repeatedly been asked the question of which I prefer to coach, club or high school.  My response has remained the same, both.   While soccer is constant, club and high school each present unique challenges and unique opportunities.  I am not setting out to compose a compare and contrast essay on club and high school soccer. There will be elements of that present in the article, but my main goal is to help the layman understand the life of a coach.

(Hit the jump for the rest of the article)

Tryout Questions for Parents and Players

Another tryout season is fast upon us!  There are clubs that are asking for a 10 month committment from high school aged players and have drawn their rosters from a select limited pool of players. But for most, the process is just getting underway as the current Spring season is winding down and the current seasonal year is concluding.

Yesterday we took a look at the tryout process in general.  I presented it in a fiction and fact format that touched on some of the misconceptions often present in the process.  Today we will narrow the focus to what parents and players should be aware of and present it in questions that should be asked form. To begin with parents need to know that soccer teams are part of a buyers market - that is, teams need players even moreso than players need teams to play on. This allows parents and players to choose the right club and team to fit their needs. It is important to note that Ohio High School Athletic Associations rules and regulations play into this dynamic as well as only 5 players from a given high school program may play together on the same club team before June 1st of each year.

Always something new to learn.

I'm well into my 50's at this stage of my life. My goal each and every day remains to learn something new each and every day. Athletics and soccer in particular these last 25 years have been the impetus of this process. I have learned much. Lately I have been reminded there is still much to learn.

Over the years I have developed something of a reputation for turning programs around in short order.  Be it a high school program like LCC or a club team with Grand Lake United I have enjoyed great success in short order. As I find myself in the second year at Lima Senior I am being humbled by the slow progress of turning this program into the powerhouse I believe it should be. The talent is present, but the culture is not present.  My previously successful "formula" for quick turnarounds is not working as well as it did in the past.

As I have been analyzing the current state of the program after our first year I have been giving considerable thought to what has worked in the past. I have also given serious consideration to what is different this time as I formulate the plan leading into next season. I feel things are beginning to fall into place and progress is being made.  Writing of the process always seem to help me draw things into focus. You are privileged (or cursed, as the case may be)  today to get a glimpse into this process.

Trusted Agents.

When taking over a program and changing the status quo it is always good to have Trusted Agents or players who support your efforts. These are usually found in those who are juniors during the first year of your directing the program. Or at least I have been blessed to have found them in the junior class at past stops.

At LCC, we had a senior Megan who was on-board from the start. She took the brunt of resistance to change that first year becoming a lightning rod for any type of conflict that arose. She was strong and focused.  Our junior was Shayna who bought in and shared the vision from the start. She not only understood what the process was but also helped define how the process would be achieved. Plus, she was strong enough to stand up to the negativity always associated with change and the negative leadership that sometimes emerges in the face of change.  God Bless Shayna. Shayna was, at times, as good a player leader as any I have had the pleasure of working with.

With Grand Lake United it was my son Lance and his teammates Tanner and Adam who set the tone. Their expectations were high and became the standards the team held itself to.  Adding Alex to that mix solidified our vision, our process and how we went about achieving in the process. We weeded out a lot of the resistance to change and negativity over a 2 year period. Alex handled any residual negativity with unbelievable diplomacy and firmness.

I take little credit as a coach for what these young people achieved.  My biggest contribution was identifying the right people to lead the turnaround.  Megan, Shayna, Lance, Tanner, Adam and Alex were easy choices as determined through both their words and their actions.

I have admittedly struggled to find the same type of player leadership in my current position. This past season's seniors never did buy into the vision. They were never able to define the process and so we meandered through the season. Now, it is true TEAM 29 at Lima Senior put together the best season in recent program history. I received lots of congratulatory remarks about having won 10 games in my first season at Lima Senior. It is also true, TEAM 29 never overcame the past culture of the program. I firmly believe TEAM 29 should have had 14 or even 15 wins by the time our season ended in the tournament. Culture eats talent and strategy for breakfast. I was reminded of this on more than one occasion this past season.

Whereas in past coaching stops I had always been able to identify junior leadership to drive the team forward, that was not the case at Lima Senior.  For the first time in my coaching career I will endure two straight classes with below average leadership. And it might well be more than two years.  Our current sophomore class some has possibilities for positive, process driven leaders,  None are a sure thing.  Cole, I force fed into a leadership role too early. He has many of the qualities I am looking for, but the circumstances were not right. Can he rebound? Can I help put him back on track? Micah is not (yet?) strong enough to stand up to negativity as Shayna did for her team. Sam is home schooled and therefore not with his teammates every day. He does possess nearly everything else I am looking for in a player leader.  I have yet to identify the quality of leadership I seek in the freshman class either.  Now, the current 8th graders?  They have several quality leaders among them.  They are probably 3 years away from having the type of significant impact on our culture that is required to move the program forward to where it realistically should be.

Trusted Agents II

Be it in club soccer or in high school soccer, parents play a significant role in your program. As a coach I interact with the student / athletes approximately 2-3 hours a day in season. Parents, naturally interact with their children a whole lot more. Hopefully.  At every coaching stop some of the strongest resistance to change I encounter is from parents.  It certainly was at LCC where the parents of the "star" were adverse to her having to share the glory (scoring goals) in the balanced system of play I brought to the program. I was also not allowed to cut two players (and their parents) from the program who made it their announced aim to subvert everything I did.

Parental resistance was also a major push back at Grand Lake United until I did cut players / parents from the "A" team and regulated them to the "B" team or cut them from the program entirely. Much easier to do so when the coach is in charge and the club administration doesn't want to deal with drama.

And once again, at Lima Senior there is strong resistance from a small group of parents seemingly intent on feeding the "me" in their child instead of the "we" in our program, our team.

I included this Trusted Agents II section only because as I look to identify leadership, define the process and formulate how we will navigate the process it has occurred to me I could move the process forward by cutting resistance from the program and advancing the soon-to-be freshman class into key roles earlier than I would normally like to. Sacrifice the team for the program.

The Past

To be perfectly honest, it is usually the past that motivates the change of culture and buy-in necessary to accomplish it.  At LCC, the program had never had a winning season. They were hungry for a change. The biggest obstacle proved to be changing a few from "Me" people to "We" people.  With Grand Lake United we had players passionate about soccer and tired of getting their butts kicked by the "big clubs" so they too were hungry, eager and receptive to change,  At Lima Senior the upperclassmen are invested in and tied to their past by a recreational league state championship they won when they were in middle school.  I sometimes feel as though they view that youth league championship as the apex of their soccer careers instead of a building block.  There is seemingly little desire to strive for, let alone replicate, that championship success at the high school level.

In my coaching career, I  have rarely been so filled with emotion as the day I overheard some of our varsity players say,

"What does it matter? 

We're going to get our asses kicked anyway."    

This off-season a parent sent me an email regarding scheduling schools of our own size / classification that stated, in part, and I quote,

"I don't feel you have the talent to compete with some of the teams you are going to be playing nor will lima (sic) senior ever have that talent and I am not concerned about seasons to come I am only concerned about this season."

Yes, the son will be a senior next fall.  Yes, he is apparently worried about his son's senior season.  Did he bother to look at our schedule for next season? Apparently not. Yes, we have shed a lot of the small schools / easy wins from our schedule. Yes, we have replaced then with big schools who are comparable with Lima Senior in terms of their soccer programs. Yes, we have scheduled a tougher team or two. Should we still compete for double digit wins? Definitely.  

Change.

Some people embrace change  

Some people resist change

Sooner or later everyone accepts change or gets left behind

There is a certain comfortableness in the current program. For some, it's as if they "know who they are" and that's good enough for them.  They beat up on small schools in the area, Are capable of competing with mid-sized schools and similarly talented large schools. And expect to get their asses kicked by traditional big school powers.  It is the classic "big frog in a little pond" syndrome.  At the very mention of moving to the big pond to prove their mettle they revert to living in the little pond where they feel safe. This is the challenge I face.  Overcoming their fear of stepping outside their comfort zones to discover that is where life and their game begins, not ends.  

Sometimes as a coach we have to admit and come to terms with the fact we cannot positively impact players as much as we would like to.  Cases in point; 1) This past season I dismissed a player from the program after having invested a lot of effort and time in him. He possesses some real potential as a player. He's his own worst enemy. He simply cannot overcome poor decision making on or off the pitch and seeks to lay the responsibility for his poor decisions at someone else's feet. It's a shame. He's slipping through the cracks and will in all likelihood become societies problem in his future. No emotion other than defiance about being dismissed.   2) I had to dismiss a second player from our team. He made a poor decision, admitted it, but due to the nature of the violation of team rules I still had no choice,  He was visibly broken up over the consequences of his decision. 

Notice: I dismissed the first player from the program and the second player from the team.  The player in the second example is back training with the team this off-season. Lesson learned. He and we are moving on.  This is how we want all situations to turn out.

Conclusions?

We, the program, will continue advancing toward the vision I have for the program.  Team 30 may or may not take a step forward from Team 29. That will be up to them as a team and perhaps specifically to the leadership that emerges.  The players of Team 30 will have a mixed lot of individual success and satisfaction derived from their participation on Team 30.

And in the end, that is what we as coaches must always remember - One gets out of something what one puts into it.

I will put my all into this program.  The program will continue to steadily advance to where I believe it can and should be.

Team 30 will get out of it's season exactly what they put into it. Judging by off-season participation rates, that will be something similar to Team 29 before them.  Meh, by my standards.

Individual players will get out of this season exactly what they invest into it. Soccer is a team sport comprised of individual players. Some of our players are putting in the effort and time to better themselves. Others, not so much. 

The more one is invested in a process, 

the more difficult it is for them 
to give up or quit. 

When the 2017 season concludes we will look back on the progress of the program, the accomplishments of the team and the progress of the individuals.  Will we be satisfied?

How to Increase Your Value to Your Team.

A very self-aware player recently asked of me, what do I need to do in order to increase my value to the team? This question came about in the context of what the athlete could do during the off season to improve for next fall. Now, I am not the athlete's coach so I cannot speak directly to what areas his coach feels should be the focus of off season work. However, I can address the general concept of increasing one's value to the team.

First and foremost is the players approach to the team, his attitude. As positivity and negativity are both contagious a player with a positive attitude is something all coaches prize.  The conscious recognition that one's attitude is a choice is a starting point. One can decide to have a positive attitude, or not as the case may be. So how we approach the decision making progress in regards to attitude is very important.

Sometimes we have athletes who are very good at talking the talk but struggle when it comes to walking the walk. That is, their words and actions are not always in one accord. So, we might ask if the player is mature enough to take things seriously. Can they adhere to the details of the process even when they would rather not do so?

Another way to phrase this is to ask. what are you personally willing to sacrifice towards the success of the team? Is there present in the student / athlete a recognition that sacrificing for the betterment of the team also promotes an athletes personal agenda? The trendy phrase today is When We Replaces Me. Is the athlete willing to place We before Me?

Respecting authority is another prime example of attitude.  If the athlete disrespects authority this is a manifestation of bad attitude. And when talking about authority the list includes parents, teachers, referees, coaches, captains and those placed in charge of organizing and directing play on the field - goalkeepers for instance. Differing opinions can be a strength to a team, but only when they are expressed at the appropriate time and in a respectful manner. Arguing with referees, coaches, captains, teammates during a match or even during active training is not appropriate.

Much of what has been discussed to this point  might be classified as a players maturity level.  Is the student / athlete mature enough to handle constructive criticism in the spirit it is offered or does the student athlete take such efforts personally as a condemnation of his play?  Can the player give constructive criticism to teammates in the spirit and tone of helping as opposed to placing blame or condemning their play?

How does the athlete deal with adversity? Is there self-discipline and mental toughness present that manifests itself in determination and resiliency to overcome?  These are traits prized by coaches and teammates alike.  They go to the issue of trust.  Is the player worthy of being trusted? Is he honest in his dealings with others - his teammates, his coaches, the referees ... himself?

Attitude is so very important, but has been so overused in the context of team sports it has lost some of its effectiveness in identifying what it is to be a good teammate.  And being a good teammate is at the core of increasing one's value to his team. At the root of being a good teammate is the ability to build productive relationships with all other members of the team.

When an athlete is a good teammate bringing positive energy and enthusiasm to the team and its pursuit of common goals, good things will follow.  Sure, working on technical skill sets and tactical understanding are important and improving in these areas will enhance a players value to his team, but we must not forget the difference attitude makes - be it good attitude or bad attitude.  Be of service to your team and its members and good things will follow.

Yelling Parents

I saw this on Facebook recently. Overt the years I have tried to make this point in numerous ways to numerous people with varying degrees of success. This is short and sweet while driving the point home with precision and power.  

Coaching Youth Soccer

I received a phone call last night from a very frustrated young coach. He had heard someone make a comment about him while his back was turned. He was “pretty sure” he knew who it was.  As he was carrying equipment off the pitch and to his car he decided to continue on. He got in his car and drove home. It was a few hours later that I received his call.

Like most youth coaches, “Michael” is a volunteer coach. He had answered the call when the local association put out a notice about needing people to serve as coaches. He is the first to admit his inexperience as a coach and need to become more familiar with “the game,” but he is also not a novice to soccer. Michael has had to rearrange his work schedule a bit in order to make the league scheduled practices and games. He’s making it work, but at a bit of a financial loss to himself and his family.  This is typical of Michael – the kids needed a coach, so Michael found a way to serve the children.

As we talked, it was obvious Michael had not fully considered what coaching youth soccer would entail. I’m reminded a bit of Miranda Lambert singing Everyone Dies Famous in a Small Town. Dependent somewhat on the sport and the community, youth coaches are on a public stage and are prone to being treated as other public figures in society are treated. If you win, you’re lauded and praised. If you lose, you are an incompetent idiot promoting your child and perhaps a few chosen friends interests and ignoring all else.

Yes, I have heard those comments directed at me as well.

I related to Michael two separate incidents to provide him food for thought.

The first situation occurred while I was a volunteer assistant coach at the local high school. My eldest son enjoyed soccer and the youth association needed coaches. I volunteered.  I had previous coaching experience, but not much experience with soccer. I recognized the need to become a student of the game. So, I asked the high school coach, whom I knew from church, if I could observe some of their practices. This I did off and on for a couple of years. One day I was asked to come to high school team camp where I met a wonderful man and soccer coach who became a good friend – Graham Ramsay.  I eventually decided to turn my notes from these experiences into “coaching manuals” for the youth soccer association because I knew others were following my path of volunteering and could undoubtedly benefit from my experiences – the good, the bad, the ugly.

In those early years of coaching soccer there was a young fella whose name was Patrick. After each of the first few seasons I coached Patrick I received the most glowing and complimentary thank you cards from Patrick and his parents. I still have those thank you cards.

I was eventually asked to join the high school coaching staff as a volunteer assistant coach and accepted that offer. My coaching of Patrick had dwindled to a role of volunteer club assistant at that point – a figurehead position with no actual coaching duties. At some point in time I apparently transformed into an incompetent ogre of a coach. At least, in the opinion of Mary and Joseph, Patrick’s parents. To this day, despite attempts to ascertain my transgression, I do not know what I did to so offend the family, but Mary and Joseph set about to make my life a living hell.

Both Mary and Joseph were school employees and the head coach brought it to my attention that they were “wearing out a path” to the athletic directors door.  I asked what about. The only response I got was that they were complaining about me being a volunteer assistant coach. No details other than that. I had no direct contact with their son at practices as I was the goalkeeper coach and Patrick was a JV field player. I asked the head coach if I needed to speak with the athletic director about this and he indicated he didn’t think that would be a good idea. So, I followed my “boss’” lead and stayed above it all.

Mary eventually took to verbally assaulting my son from the sidelines at games. It was nasty and it was brutal. Again, Mary and Joe were school employees. After enduring two years of this, my son had had enough. He quit soccer and played football instead.  I resigned from my position as a volunteer assistant with the high school soccer staff at the same time.  I made it a point to address the athletic director when I did so. She stated she knew Mary and Joseph were out of control, that they were poor representatives of the school and apologized on behalf of the school while expressing regret that it had come to this. Little solace for my son and I at that point in time.

My point to Michael was simply this, stand up for yourself. Do not depend on someone else to defend you or fight your battles for you.

The second story centers around a spring time youth soccer league I founded to promote soccer in our school district. I volunteered all my time. I had a small core group of volunteers that helped me. We numbered a half dozen tops. I handled all registrations, the assigning of teams, recruitment of coaches, ordering of t-shirts, equipment and field supplies. We laid out the fields and kept them freshly painted. I had a lady, whose son is now the head coach at the high school, help with awards and end of year pizza parties. We did all this on a shoestring budget with any profits being redirected to the high school soccer programs.

The league was a huge success. We grew from approximately 70 youth in grades K-8^th that first year to over 300 participants and two locations in the final year. People from surrounding communities, some up to 45 miles away, wanted to be a part of this program. Despite the astounding growth of our product, our brand, some people were not content. This is to be expected. With a rapidly growing organization serving increasing numbers there will be a malcontent or two.

In what proved to be the last year of the spring league  a group came through who thought they were above the rules and protocols established for conducting the program. They added countless hours to my already tight schedule with their constant complaining and the complaints I fielded concerning them. Many of this groups stated concerns arose because they had not taken the time to read information provided to them. If they had read the printed materials, including a FAQ section, they would not have had to come to me in complaint. One particular parent came to my home to inform me to my face it was the most disorganized league she had ever seen. It wasn’t, she just wanted it to be something it was never intended to be. It wasn’t a good fit.

My point to Michael was simply this, sometimes your good intentions are not enough. This small vocal group of parents increased my volunteer work load to the point that it was no longer viable for me to continue.  I offered to turn the program over to others – there were no takers once they learned the work load I carried to make it happen for the kids.

Michael has a son on the team he coaches. So my final point to be driven home was that unless he planned on moving he would remain in the same community and likely the same soccer community as the people he is dealing with. Yes, I still see Mary and Joseph on occasion. The lady who told me I was so disorganized? Our sons ended up playing on the same high school team together.

Michael asked if I was bitter over these incidents.  I am not. I was most definitely upset and frustrated at the time.  I learned long ago to focus on what I can control. If I wrong someone and realize that I have, I will apologize and ask forgiveness.  In both situations I did what I could, in the one case what I was allowed to do.  My only other responsibility was to forgive myself for becoming upset and frustrated and to forgive those who tried my patience. I have done that.

I used an adapted version of a well known Mia Hamm quote to make what I hope was the lasting impression on Michael.

The vision of a coach is spending your lunch break planning a practice or making out a lineup, arriving at the pitch before everyone else to prepare for practice and to be available for the players being dropped off early, dealing caringly and respectfully with multiple players and families, being the last to leave the pitch and after putting equipment away and policing the area being the adult waiting for the last of players to be picked up.

Michael, although you probably did not realize it at the time, this is what you signed up for. There will be uninformed parents who do not know or appreciate that you do so much more than just put starters into positions and send substitutions into the game. There are parents who will look upon you as a baby sitter providing them a couple hours free time away from their own kids This type of person often fails to recognize you coach because you love being around kids and desire to make a positive difference not only in their games but in their lives.

The positives far outweigh the negatives.

The negatives disappoint and hurt you because you care. You give your best  (not perfect) effort on behalf of the players and it is difficult to hear someone denigrate your efforts and even your name. When you have been beaten down, remember the laughs … and tears… shared with team members. Sharing the heartbreak and doing your best to provide a comforting word when an own goal is scored or a game is lost. The huge smiles and genuine excitement when a player scores a great goal, makes a spectacular save or the team wins the game. Besides answering the call for volunteers, these are the reasons you coach and what makes it worth while for you to do so.

Where the elite kids SHOULDN't meet.

This article by Tim Keown is from August of 2011.  It is a tremendous read on a subject we have devoted some time to here on this blog.  Keown does a tremendous job. While the focus is on baseball and basketball, soccer is certainly applicable as well.  It is a tad long, but well worth the time.

Click on this link for the full original story: Where the Elite Kids Shouldn't Meet.

Your kid is good, right? Really good? You don't want to brag, but he can do some things on the field that other kids his age won't even try. You played a little ball yourself, and you know the difference.

Make no mistake: There's someone out there for you. He's putting together a team, and he's got a pipeline to the best tournaments. He knows people. He'll have tryouts and he'll tell you what you want to hear. It's expensive, sure, but who can put a price on your kid's future? If he's got a chance to be the best, he needs to play with and against the best, right?

Judging by the direction we're taking preteen youth sports, it appears we have completely lost our minds. Gone crazy -- collectively and individually. It's become something of a hobby for me to read the local sports coverage of the three or four sub-20,000 circulation papers in my area, and I am here to report that the center cannot hold.

It is a wonder I have survived as a soccer coach.

The very first soccer team I coached was a group of U6 boys known as The Raptors who went undefeated in their recreational league.   

My training in soccer consisted of a brief lecture given by the local high school coach and a few handouts explaining basic rules and restarts. We were given 4 practices before a season of 10 games began and were told it would be a good idea to hold a pizza party at the end of the season to pass out trophies.

I used the four practices to teach kickoffs, throw-ins, goal kicks and corner kicks. 

On the first game day, I put the players in a 1-3-3-2 formation for no other reason than that is what the high school coach recommended. We proceeded to thrash the opponents and a budding career as a soccer coach began. 

What a train wreck.

Meddling

Many ideas for articles come from you, the readers of this blog.  I have had quite a spate of conversations in recent days about people meddling in athletic programs.  I have always found it curious how one particular topic seems to come to the fore during a specific time frame. I have no sound idea for why meddling is the prominent topic these last couple of weeks. Nevertheless, it is and so I will share a few general thoughts on the subject.

Just this morning, I read a rather lengthy article about the Cleveland Browns of the NFL.  Yes, I am a Brown's fan.  Sigh.  Lack of continuity has plagued the Browns for years now. Constant turnover in the front office, the personnel department, coaching staff and on the roster has sabotaged any effort to put a respectable product on the field since the franchise returned to the NFL.  It starts at the top with owners meddling, or micro-managing every aspect of the franchise.  In Cleveland's case, owner Jimmy Haslam is responsible for keeping Josh Gordon in Cleveland and bringing Johnny Manziel to Cleveland over the objections of the people he hired to run the personnel department. Front office meddles in personnel and personnel meddles in coaching in what can be described as a trickle down deluge of disastrous proportions. 

Click here for the article on the Browns mess

High school soccer is plagued by teacher unions demanding their members receive preference for coaching positions regardless of merit.  As it was explained to me years ago by a sympathetic athletic director, "there is no so such thing as more qualified" when weighing potential coaching candidates. Greater weight is attached to a teacher seeking coaching employment than to a non-teacher seeking the same position.  "If Bill Belichick applied for the head football coach position I would still have to give the job to a teacher, if the teacher had any qualifications at all."  I myself recently ran afoul of such a scenario. I was told I was the best candidate for the job, but the position went to someone who just graduated from college and is a permanent substitute for the district and would probably be hired into a full time position for next fall when the season would begin.   I understand. I knew going in to the interview process that I would not be getting that coaching position. As soon as the athletic director mentioned "union" I knew it was over. Such is the meddling nature of teacher unions in athletics. I went through the process anyway for the experience and practice. I have my eye on another position I "think" may come open.

A coaching colleague had to withstand an attempt to overthrow him in mid-season last fall.  I kid you not, the school posted the head coach soccer position after the season started. He withstood that challenge and went on to complete the season, but one of the persons seeking his job turned out to be an assistant coach. Talk about awkward.  I have recently learned the position will be re-posted as a teacher employed by the school district has expressed interest in being the head coach,

I listened to another person vent about the "team mom" who flirted with and all but seduced a male coach to ensure her son would be captain of the team and win the desired post season awards so he could include mention of these on his college applications.  A scene right out of a Hollywood movie, you say?  I might have agreed had I not witnessed similar situations from both a coaching and a parental perspective. 

Referees are not immune to meddling either.  I saw a high school basketball referee years ago whose attitude was that the game was all about him and everyone was there to see him. He announced before the game that he was one his way to officiating college basketball and then it was on to the NBA. Each and every call he made (and there were many) was done with attitude and flair! Demonstrative doesn't begin to describe his approach.  He was going for charismatic, but as anyone who has officiated will tell you the two don't mix at all.

One of the my more memorable predicaments occurred when I was hired by an athletic director to clean up a program beset by meddlesome parents. Everything went well, until the athletic director himself was run off by meddlesome parents and the new athletic director turned out to be one of those meddlesome parents.  It got to the point where I was instructed who to play by the new athletic director despite the athletic director admittedly having next to no knowledge about soccer. 

There was also the time for no apparent reason a superintendent fought tooth and nail against fielding a junior varsity squad. Every objection presented by the superintendent was successfully dealt with. In the end, all that was left was the cost of providing numerals to the athletes depicting graduating year that could be applied to their letterman jackets.  About $15.00 total. I offered to pay for the numerals. Now, finances were not the actual reason for the reluctance to field a JV team. The superintendent backed herself into a corner by meddling in a growing and successful program. In the end there was a need to save face and no way to do so gracefully.

A coaching mentor once related to me a similar situation he found himself in many years ago. The then athletic director instructed him not to play a black athlete at quarterback. He had to play a white athlete at quarterback. The black athlete was clearly superior in every regard, but that did not matter. As in my case, if the coach wished to continue coaching he had to abide by his bosses (the athletic director) orders. The white kid played quarterback. The coach left after the season

I have seen club teams quite literally torn apart by such meddling.  A power hungry assistant coach attempts to overthrow the current coach. When that fails the assistant recruits everyone who will go with him to a new team.  Or a parent unhappy with the team her son is assigned to within a club attempts to overthrow the decision makers and start a new club / team that will accommodate her son.

I once had an administrator refuse to pay me over a dispute he had with a players family.  I had absolutely no leverage with either party in the situation. It finally brewed over the next season when in mid-season the administrator stated the player could no longer play. The administrator went so far as stating to me that he would be coming to the next match and confiscating the players card to prevent him from taking the field. And this was the goalkeeper he was going to ban from playing! 

I am also reminded of certain players through the years who were disruptive when they did not get to play the position they wanted to or did not receive the playing time they wanted. One player, frustrated with what he perceived as a lack of playing time stripped his uniform off behind the bench and put his street clothes on with over 20 minutes remaining on the clock of a high school match. A second example saw a player badger the coaching staff non-stop in pursuit of his own agenda.  Or in the case of Johnny Manziel and Josh Gordon of the aforementioned Cleveland Browns players will drink or do drugs, be late to practices and games and in other ways be generally irresponsible and indifferent to their responsibility to themselves, their teammates and coaches

Another common occurrence involves the parent on the sidelines who thinks (s)he knows more than the coach and isn't afraid to share his knowledge with anyone within earshot.  I have first hand experience with this as a parent / assistant coach and as a head coach.  Mary was an absolute nightmare in berating any player she viewed as a threat to her sons position on the team.  Ed was worse as he struggled to deal with his daughters injury ruining her senior season and whatever dreams he had of her going on to play in college.

I find it extremely difficult to sit in the stands at a soccer match as a parent / fan with people who know me. I get asked questions about interpreting the Laws of the Game, coaching decisions, tactics and strategies, how an athlete can improve his chances for playing time and any number of other game related topics.  Some people (Mary and Ed as examples) gleefully embrace the attention and are oblivious to finding themselves sitting alone as everyone moves away from them.  As for me, I prefer not to sit in the stands.  My wife enjoys my company and seeks my commentary not realizing the awkward position she sometimes puts me in.  I much prefer to sit or stand by myself as many have witnessed for I want no part of being seen as meddlesome.  Even so, I was accused of being meddlesome this past season. My transgression was cheering positive reinforcement to players.  I am quite serious. The coach took offense to my voice being heard cheering on the efforts of players other than my son. So, I modified my behavior to cheer only for my son... which did not go unnoticed by other parents. I acquiesced to the coach's wishes in an effort to protect my son from the coach seeking retribution or revenge. It didn't work. I knew it would not. My cheering positive plays the team made or directing those cheers to my son solely could not address the coach's insecurity and frustrations in the first place. The coach felt threatened by my presence although I had recommended him for the position, vouched for him as a coach and campaigned to the athletic director on his behalf. In the end there was a coach meddling with a parent cheering positively for the team? 

Where's the motivation in that?

And that's where all this is leading.

I grew up on "The team. The Team. THE TEAM!"

My actions whether as a player, a coach, an assistant coach or parent have always been guided by the philosophy shared by Bo Schembechler in the above video. It's all about what is best for THE TEAM.  In all the instances of real or perceived meddling related above, the team became of secondary importance. Selfishness and individuality were the motivation of owners, front office, personnel departments, teacher unions, athletic directors, administrators, coaches, assistant coaches, referees, parents and yes, players too. And in every case when the focus shifted from the team to the individual the quality of the experience went down for not only the meddler and his or her target, but everyone around them.

It's all about the team, bout the team.

No meddlers.

Be Cool Coach!

Good coaches know that their attitude filters down to their players. When a coach is calm and poised their players tend to be as well and play reflects this. These teams overcome adversity by “playing through it”. They tend to be empowered problem solvers, creative and resilient.

If a coach is constantly yelling, arguing with referees and seemingly angry about every little thing, his team will be as well. Play is often rushed, desperate, out of control and punctuated by “unforced” mistakes. Everyone is blamed but no one is held accountable.

Not only will players follow the coach’s lead, but so too will parents. The coach who berates officials, yells at his players and is quick to find fault is likely to have an unruly parents sideline as well. There is often a general sense of unhappiness and anger that permeates the entire team. Soccer becomes a chore instead of being fun.

Calm, poised and in control does not equate to being cold, emotionless and overly analytical.  It simply means being in control of those things that can be under your control.  I’m not sure if I have ever witnessed a referee change his call because he was berated by a coach or parents, have you?  Yelling at a player for every mistake he makes is hardly a good way to go about instilling confidence, is it? Blaming your team for playing poorly is certainly shirking responsibility on the coaches part for it was his responsibility to prepare the team to compete, correct?

Good coaches maintain an even keel when coaching. They don’t get too excited when goals are scored and do not get too down when goals are allowed. The adjustments made are of a thoughtful and reasoned variety instead of knee jerk reactive decision rooted in the emotions of the moment.  Good coaches tend to use their heads more so than their mouths.  Thoughtful analysis when assessing on-field in-game situations instead of panicked chaotic solutions thrown out hoping something will eventually work.

I try to always keep in mind that my teams are never as good as they appear to be when winning and never as bad as they appear to be when losing. Teams are generally somewhere in the middle of the peak performance and worst performance. It’s important to be realistic about your team and focused on continuous progress and improvement over the course of a game and a season.

Even in the most dominant wins there are weaknesses to be found in your team’s play. And in the most lopsided losses there will have been some positives. It is important to recognize both positives and negatives in-game, but equally as important to share them with your players after the match has finished.

Do your best to remain calm, cool and collected for the good of your team. Don’t cast blame. Do empower the players to embrace on-the-field problems and adversity that they can solve and overcome these things. Do not become angry at players who are giving the best effort they have that day. Encourage players struggling with their play by lending them your confidence and letting them know you believe in them.

Have a vision for how you want your team to play and conduct themselves then be the embodiment of that vision for them. Lead by example… for that is what you do regardless of how you act. Be a positive example, a positive role model and your team will fall in line behind you. Success and wins will follow.

Who is the driving force behind playing?

I want to preface this by stating I am a member of several coaching lists or email groups through which information is exchanged, opinions shared and the like. The member coaches are quote literally from all over the globe and include professional coaches from well known clubs down through the ranks to high school coaches toiling away in small towns across America. I state this so it is understood the people and situations I am about to discuss are not necessarily known personally to me and in this manner their identities are protected.

Situation #1 -  At tryouts it was determined a player should be relegated to the clubs second team. The player had participated with the same club for several years and always on the first team.  The coaching staff felt as though he had plateaued and not progressed as a player over the course of the last couple of seasons. The player's mother was quite irate and even hostile about her son being relegated to the second team. It was explained to both player and parent there would be ample opportunities to guest play for the first team through the club pass system.  It was presented as a best of both worlds situation where the player would actually get to play in more games than had he remained with the first team.  Mother was still not happy.  The player seemed rather nonchalant about it all.   Time and again throughout the season the player was asked to guest play with the first team and more often than not the player refused the invitation.  The mother was apparently unaware of the player declining these opportunities

Situation #2 - This actually is two separate but similar situations. In each case a father made the decision to move his son to another club.  The only problem was, the son did not want to change clubs.  Apparently the fathers had greater visions of grandeur for their sons while the sons were content playing soccer with their friends.  In one case the player remained where he had been and in the other case the father forced the son to try out for an academy program, and in so doing lost his spot with the club team he had been with for years. The academy experience did not turn out as expected ... or perhaps as hoped... but probably as could have been anticipated if viewed through unbiased vision.

As I read the exchanges about these players and their parents I could not help but wonder about the parents motivation in each situation.  It seems to me the child's wishes were being largely ignored as the parent chased a dream.   In situation #1 the player turned down invitations extended to guest play with the first team unbeknown to his mother. All the while the mother was sure her son was being disrespected.  It turns out being on a successful soccer team was something mom was far more proud of than the son was. Not only was pride a factor, but identity and self worth were artificially inflated by being associated with "A" team. 

Allow that to sink in for a moment.

In the second situation, it was fathers pushing their sons to perceived greater heights than the sons had set their eyes on. The fathers pursued prestige and "better" opportunities for their sons without consulting with their sons as to what the sons wanted.  The driving force was seemingly a perception the child was being held back by local circumstances and they needed to move the player to entirely different states to find the right opportunity for their son to excel in.

Allow that to also to sink in for a moment.

There is a third situation that will serve to bring the others into clearer focus.  Here we have a sweat drenched individual that spends every possible moment on the pitch with a ball at his feet. He truly loves the game. His passion for soccer runs deeper than anyone elses described here.  How do I know this? Because this player has been forbidden to play soccer by his father.  This player has to sneak out to the fields and does so with full appreciation that if caught the consequences will be severe.  I do know the people under discussion here. The son has another year until he goes out on his own and will be able to play the game whenever he wants. And play he will.

In the first two situations we find parents living through their sons. It is actually the passion of the parents that burns stronger, or at least far differently, than that of their sons. In the third situation it is the child's passion that burns so brightly the parent cannot extinguish it.

Why do the kids play?

With me it was baseball.  Evidently my father was a pretty good baseball player. An older brother was spoken of glowingly as a shortstop and pitcher.  Me?  I never did like baseball, but dad signed me up to play each season. Baseball became a lightning rod in a rather contentious relationship between father and son.  Baseball was my father's passion, not mine.  I was evidently fairly good at baseball. The middle school and high school coaches tried each spring to convince me to play.  I actually made the college team although I declined to play.  Trying out for it was more my way of establishing if I was as good as my father thought I was ... or could be. Turning down the opportunity was my way of thumbing my nose at my father even though he had since passed away. I played basketball.

So it is in reading of the situations described above that I wonder what the players are actually thinking. What are their desires, their dreams?  Why do they play soccer?  And most importantly, have their parents ever discussed this with them?

CBA Blog hits the big time!

The CBA Soccer Blog was evidently the topic of discussion in the women's restroom at a local high school match this evening. That's hitting the big time, right there!  Women discussing this blog in a public restroom!  LOL  I understand it wasn't all flattering, but that's fine with me. Controversy is good for generating hits on the site.  Thanks ladies!  Much appreciated.

Practice, er ... Training.

In many cases it is simply a case of semantics, but soccer and its culture is different from many “American” sports. I was once again reminded of this recently when a young player I am working with attempted to explain to his parent that I was “the trainer” and not a coach.  Even his coach was not quite sure what I was going to be doing with the team as he originally thought I was there to “condition” the boys. Seems he thought running, plyometrics and such would be a good thing for his team. When everyone saw me working with the boys on passing and receiving there was almost a sense of disappointment that I was there to conduct a practice session, i.e. coach them.

I have come to appreciate that “training” more closely approximates what it is I do with teams. In my mind, players can practice the individual fundamentals on their own. In training I put the team through a distinct progression of combined technical and tactical activities that train them how to work together on the pitch. In a sense it is learning how to properly apply the individual fundamentals they are working on developing.

The passing and receiving we were working on actually involved off-the-ball player movement as a means to prepare to play the ball, vision, back footed play, proper receiving and passing technique and much more. No one part being less or more important than the other. It’s sort of like playing in a concert band where each individual in each section learns their part and then the conductor puts all the different sections together to play the piece in its entirety. Each section has an equally important part. Independently they may not sound like much but together they are capable of producing beautiful music!

The trainer needs to have specific goals for each training session.  This is true regardless of if he is training a recreational level team, a national side or a team that falls somewhere in between. Therefore, a clear distinct training plan is necessary for each training session with specific goals in mind to be achieved.

When I state to people that I will often devote 1.5 hours towards planning a 1.5 hour training session I get a lot of doubtful looks in return.  However, it is true that I devote a lot of time to planning a proper practice, uh, training session. That single session training plan must fall within a framework of a seasonal plan that has within it monthly and even weekly plans.  

There is a certain amount of flexibility that must be involved in the process.  The seasonal plan will be designed to move the team from where it is at in the pre-season through to certain and predetermined developmental points at season’s end.  It cannot be a hip, hop and skip journey bouncing here and there. Rather it is a process of reaching level 1 and proceeding through successive levels until the season end goal is achieved.

Each training session must provide an opportunity for players to develop technical excellence in their individual skill sets, opportunities to apply individual skill and basic combination play in small sided games before providing a simulated game environment for group tactics.  Pressure in the terms of available space and time to play in begin at a familiar and comfortable level increasing throughout the session until it culminates in actual game conditions.

I typically train a team once a week in season. I expect the coach to work with players on the same concepts I introduce during other practice / training sessions he holds. I will increase both the instruction given and the intensity of training sessions as the season progresses and the players prove capable of handling. By the end of the season the improvement in play should be self evident to my eye and hopefully to that of players, coaches and parents as well.

Imagine if you will...

There have been multiple requests made to re-post this article. I am honoring those requests because the points of emphasis contained within are worthy of being reviewed again.


I have been coaching various sports for nearly 30 years now. Sometimes I wonder why I have stuck with it but mostly I enjoy working with players. To be witness to individuals developing their talent and combining it with others to form a team can be a wonderful experience. There is a process to it all and it never seems to grow old.

As a coach I want to see consistency in performance from the players I work with. Since I demand consistency from them I believe they deserve consistency from me. When we are able to combine consistency with continuous and constant improvement, good things happen for everyone involved. Sometimes things work out better than others but generally progress is made, experienced gained, a little something about life is learned.

Talent Evaluation.

Summer camp season is coming to a close and high school season began yesterday here in Ohio. Talent evaluation is very much on my mind this week. At every camp I conducted I found that I valued certain players differently than the coach I was conducting camp for did. Beauty is indeed in the eyes of the beholder.

As I prepared for a camp that was to focus on striker play and finishing a coach sent me an email detailing the virtues of two players that would be attending. I believe one was a sophomore and the other a freshmen. The abilities of these players were lauded as the coach proclaimed they would be his starting forwards this fall. There was a third player from his team, a senior. After the first session I was wondering about the coaches reasoning as the senior put on a show. The senior demonstrated a strong work ethic, great attitude and the ability to strike powerfuly and accurately with either foot.  The senior also possessed a strikers mentality - worked hard off the ball and was always thinking about scoring the ball.  The younger players were certainly solid players but not on the level of the senior, in my opinion.

Sometimes I feel like I am beating a dead horse.

Here is another good article about youth sports. It's a short read and well worth the time.

http://www.boston.com/lifestyle/health/mdmama/2013/05/parents_lets_keep_some_perspective_about_youth_sports.html



At my son's soccer game the other day, a parent kept yelling very loudly at one of the players on the other team, giving various directions as to what the player should and shouldn't do. When I say "very loudly", I mean so loud--and harsh--that it startled me each time.

The kids were first graders.
 

The mother of one of my son's teammates (who was wincing along with me) told me how at her daughter's soccer game earlier that day, the coach of the other team was berating the players, telling them what a terrible job they were doing and calling them names.
 

Those kids were sixth graders.
 

Really?
 

Now, I get that these are extremes. But with five kids, I've been to a lot of sporting events, and have listened to a lot of parents and coaches pushing--in good ways and bad ways--kids to achieve. And while achievement is generally a worthy goal, I'm not sure it's the best goal for youth sports.
 

Often, when I talk to other parents, I hear stuff about hoping for athletic scholarships. I've got two kids in college now, and so know first-hand how outrageously expensive it is and how every little bit helps. But only about 2 percent of high school athletes get athletic scholarships to college--and very few of them are full rides. The chances of "going pro" are even smaller: about 0.03 percent for basketball, 0.08 percent for football, for example. Basically, unless your kid is extremely gifted and extremely lucky, he's not getting any money out of sports.
 

Here's what your kid can get out of youth sports:

• Exercise. With a third of US kids overweight or obese, we need to get more kids moving. Not only does exercise help kids now, it builds healthy habits for a lifetime.
• Friendships. Sports can be a great way to build relationships and social skills.
• Positive self-image. Feeling strong and learning skills can make a kid feel really good about herself.
• Involvement in positive activities. Sports are a way better way to spend your time than video games or hanging out on the streets; for many kids, sports are what keep them on a good life path.
• Time management skills. Athletes, especially high school athletes, need to learn to get homework and other things done around practice.
• Fun! With the right approach and attitude from the athlete and the coach, sports can be a lot of fun.

They are, however, not fun when you are being yelled at--or pushed all the time to achieve. Which is probably why the majority of kids drop out of sports before high school--and miss out on all the benefits entirely.
 

So, parents, let's keep some perspective. When you are at the sidelines, let the coach do the coaching--if you are going to yell anything, make it encouragement. If you see coaches treating kids badly, speak up--and find a different team if it continues. Don't push your kids to achieve--we should always try to do our best, but it's not always the point of everything. It's certainly not the point of youth sports.
 

Sometimes it's good enough--better, even--to show up, play the game and have fun.

The view from the parents sideline.

Had the all too rare honor and privilege to watch my son Lance play from the parents sideline. I'm usually watching him play as a coach and trust me when I say the two perspectives are vastly different. Lance guest played for league rival ISC Storm in the Mayfest tournament and I thoroughly enjoyed myself watching him play as a parent / fan instead of as a coach.

For his high school team Lance plays right back and center mid. For our club team he has played almost exclusively as a right back. It was good to see him play almost exclusively as a center midfielder this weekend and despite being a bit rusty in the role, he played very well. His distributions from the center midfield position resulted in 10 assists on the teams 13 goals for the weekend. The calculated and well-timed runs he made from his center midfield position resulted in his scoring a game-winning goal! An astounding statistic.  Yeah, I'm proud of what he accomplished. ;)

I learned quite a bit watching Terry Paulus, the ISC Storm coach manage my son.  Lance played a lot of minutes until results of game were secured. I'm not entirely sure how much instruction Lance received about how to play center midfield within their system, but he settled in as the defensive center mid / pivot player from where he could change the point of attack, distribute to forwards / wings and make runs into the box.  It is a very dynamic role and within our own team system what I consider to be the most important position to be effectively manned.  Providing a protective presence in front of the backs while also being the key facilitator on offense is not an easy task. Great job Lance!

The ISC Storm play a far more direct game than our own team likes to play. I loathe straightline kick and run soccer but must admit Lance's service to the forwards this weekend reminded me of how effective a tactic it can be when the "kick" part is accurate effective service rather than just "whacking the ball forward."  In the finals Lance had 3 assists in the first 12 minutes and the game was pretty much over at that point. Our club team lacks that type of dynamic distributor and this may lead to Lance playng more in the center midfield as we close out the season.

I actually thought our team had someone who could fill that role for us, but his heart is in a different position. One thing I know and appreciate as a goalkeeper coach is the neccessity of having a passion for the position. If a player does not embrace the position, you might as well not play him there. Last spring our team had a number of players asked to play out of position and most did not embrace the roles they were asked to play. This neccessitated changes in the roster for this spring to match roles with players that embraced playing them.  We still have a couple of players "playing out of position", but most of the players have embraced the positions they have been asked to play and the  roles they have been asked to fill. They have made personal sacrifices for the good of the team.  As a coach, I value this dearly. It is, in part, what differentiates decent teams to elevate their collective games and become great teams.

New friend Cathy Rau also introduced a new-to-me phrase describing the parents sidelines - she calls it the "expert side."  This was applied mostly in reference to the referees but is also applicable to coaching I would think.  It's is actually a very apt description as every parent seems to believe they know more than the trained and licensed officials... and often times more than the coaches as well. We were quite fortunate to have one of the best officials around in Mr. Greg Reynolds for two of the matches this weekend. Mr. Reynolds does an outstanding job of communicating to players on the pitch often using his voice to control the game when others would resort to excessive whistles and cards.  I have always apprciated  Mr. Reynolds officiating from the coaching sideline, but do so even more having watched him facilitate the game from the perspective of the parents sidelines.

Perhaps the most interesting thing this weekend was watching a team grow together and mature right before our eyes.  Their first game they played well. The guest players assimulated well and the team as a whole not only accepted them but embraced them. The second game saw the relationship between team and guest players struggle a little bit as everyone let their guard down, so to speak. Passes just missed and timing was not nearly as efficient as it had been in the first game. Growing pains in the relationship.  The third game was a really solid showing and the champonship game was a dominating performance.  Everything was clicking early and often. I know this, ISC Storm this Monday morning is not the same ISC Storm team we defeated twice in the last two weeks. They have improved significantly. The guest players were a part of that for sure, but even when they were not in the game the improved team play was obvious.

So, Congratulations to the ISC Storm U16B 2013 Mayfest Champions!  We will see you in a couple of weeks at the Creek Classic. I sincerely hope our own team continues to improve at a similar rate. Should be a great matchup. Thanks for a great weekend!