Intensity

For one reason or another the words "soft spoken" have been associated with me quite a few times in recent months.  I'm not exactly sure why as I would never describe myself in that manner. I think perhaps people are commenting on my calm demeanor during matches and even during training.  The truth is, I have to work extremely hard to maintain a steady approach - not too high, not too low.  Controlling and channeling my competitiveness into a positive and beneficial direction is a learned behavior for me as anyone exposed to me in my younger days can attest to.

Some years ago while an assistant coach at Lima Shawnee high school we had a very talented player come through by the name of Brandon Morse.  To this day, Brandon remains the best high school player this area has ever produced.  It was pure joy and privilege to watch Brandon every day for four high school seasons.  Amazing skills and a competitive mindset that seems to become rarer as I get older.



In an attempt to raise the intensity in my own training sessions I used to relate stories to my teams of Brandon's years at Shawnee. Those practices were "wars".  The word intense does not do justice to how those teams approached training. Everything was contested.  Every activity had a winner or loser. Practices were more competitive than most of the matches the team played against opponents.

Looking back, I think using the word  "wars" to describe those practices was inappropriate.  A war is most definitely an adversarial confrontation with plenty of negative emotion.  For the most part those teams liked one another and had fun playing the game.  As the schools goalkeeper coach at that time I know the athletes I worked with laughed a lot during training while competing hard against one another. And we had some truly outstanding goalkeepers during that run.

Competition can bring out the best in athletes.

We also see competition bring out the worst in athletes.

It's no different for coaches. In my younger days, I did not always handle adversity well.  The competitive drive was so strong in me and certainly not channeled in a beneficial or positive way for me or my teams.  And if I thought one of my players or the team as a whole had been wronged ... well, I wasn't afraid to show it.  I sometimes think this is because men like Bo Schembechler and Bobby Knight were early coaching idols.  Both great men and elite coaches who were known to get a little feisty on the sidelines now and again.

It wasn't until coaching a U12 soccer team a decade or so ago that I developed a deeper understanding about intensity and its true value.  On that youth team there was a young man named Trenton who was as intense in practices and games as Brandon Morse ever was.  There was a difference though and it is that difference that changed the way I approach both training and games.

Trenton was a good kid from a rough home environment. Big, strong, fast, aggressive and possessing a good skill set. He was also his own worst enemy. He racked up 7 yellow cards and one straight red card in 11 games.  Yes, at U12.  Trenton was so intense as to be a threat to the safety of opponents, his own teammates and even himself.  After the red card I suspended him and of his own accord he never played for us again.  He eventually left the game of soccer entirely.

Trenton was a wake up call for me as a coach. I have never received a card of any type of my own volition, but I nonetheless saw some of myself in Trenton and knew I had to change ... and change my message about intensity.  Did I contribute to Trenton's on-field behavior?  I don't think so, as Trenton had troubles on the pitch both before and after he played for me. 

The Ohio High School Athletic Association publishes a message that is often read before contests about participants being friendly rivals.  I have come to understand the difference between friendly competition and describing training sessions as wars. So too have my teams.

This past spring was the culmination of a long team building process with my youngest son's team. They practiced with the same type of intensity as those Shawnee teams of long ago did.  And in similar fashion, training was often more competitive than actual matches were.  It is true there was tremendous talent on that team. Everyone who so desired has gone on to play in college and those who did not, certainly could have if they chose to do so.  There wasn't a lot of yelling or screaming by coaches or players at those practices. No dirty play.  Just intense competition and lots of fun in a workman like atmosphere.  They brought out the best in one another and in doing so brought out the best in themselves.

I believe this team reflects my (new / improved) personality and approach to the game.  I remain ultra-competitive and I hate to lose more than I like to win.  The difference, in my mind, is the learned ability to focus intensity inward towards myself and our team. We cannot allow our intensity to boil over about things beyond our control - this was something I was guilty of in my younger days.  Once our intensity becomes self-motivation then it can be a positive influence in our games and in life.

So, do not mistake my quiet intensity for being soft spoken.  As I tell players and parents alike when informing them they will not negatively address referees; "I can get the referee's attention" if I feel the need to do so.  I have a BIG voice and can make it heard when appropriate it do so. I have simply found it more effective to limit the times that I raise my voice.  I do not have this mastered yet as people who know me will attest to. I am simply getting better at it with each passing day / season.